Psychologists call it atychiphobia, but you may know it better as fear of failure. Whatever you call it, those misgivings can hold you back in your career and personal life. You may miss out on promising opportunities or unintentionally sabotage yourself to prove that your gloomy outlook is correct.
What stops you from living up to your potential and going after what you really want?
Try this foolproof formula that will help you to understand and overcome your self-doubts.
Learning from Experience:
Welcome growth. Victories and setbacks can both make you stronger depending on how you respond to them. When things don’t turn out the way you planned, figure out what you need to do differently next time.
Develop contingency plans. You’ll feel more confident taking risks if you analyze the possible outcomes in advance. That way, you can be prepared to switch your approach if needed.
Start off small. If you’re paralyzed by doubts, break your projects down into more manageable steps. Ease into home improvement by organizing your hall closet before you try remodeling your kitchen.
Hold yourself accountable. Acknowledging your mistakes is the first step in being able to learn from them. Take responsibility for your actions and choices.
Identify factors within your control. Target areas where you’ll enjoy the most payoff. You may not be able to do much about the way your boss micromanages you, but you can change your own communication strategies.
Think positive. Remind yourself of what you have to gain. Give yourself credit for venturing beyond your comfort zone.
Change your self-talk. Pay attention to the way you talk to yourself. Are you reinforcing your doubts or giving yourself encouraging and affirmative messages? Choose words that inspire and reassure you.
Reach out to others. Let others know that you welcome constructive feedback. Thank them for their input and tell them when their advice helps you to perform more effectively.
Explore root causes.It may help to know where your fear of failure came from so you can spot your triggers. Maybe you became reluctant to try new things after your parents or an elementary school teacher criticized you harshly. Maybe you’re feeling shaky after a recent divorce or layoff.
Act promptly. Procrastination is one common symptom of fear of failure. If you put things off because you feel anxious, start writing out timelines that will help you buckle down and stay on track.
Focus on progress. Perfectionism can also be an obstacle. Instead of trying to be flawless, take satisfaction in setting challenging goals and making an effort to achieve them. Compete with yourself instead of trying to meet unattainable standards.
Calculate costs. While you’re contemplating what could go wrong if you speak up at meetings or ask someone out for a date, you may be overlooking the price of inaction. Imagine what you could be missing out on each time you hesitate.
Visualize success. Picture what your life would be like if you had the confidence to pursue your dreams. The images you bring to mind may help you to clarify your priorities and understand where to channel your efforts.
Lighten up. Your mistakes may be a great source of entertainment if you can love and accept yourself as you are. Humor helps to put fears in perspective.
Enjoy more happiness and success by coming to terms with your fear of failure. When you commit yourself to learning from experience, you may still feel unsure of yourself sometimes. However, you’ll stop letting your doubts get in the way of pursuing your goals.
Online banking has become very popular for simple banking transactions. These banks can make actively managing your financial life much easier. With an internet bank, you’ll be able to monitor your accounts, pay bills, and transfer money, all with the click of a button.
But if you’re considering online banking, remember that internet (or “direct”) banks are not always a viable substitute for brick-and-mortar banks in all cases. To help you decide whether to switch to online, stay with traditional banking, or do a combination of both, let’s examine the advantages and disadvantages of internet banks.
Advantages of Internet Banks
Convenience. Direct banking institutions are open for business anywhere there’s a web connection. Other than times when website maintenance is being performed, they’re always open. Your account balance and information are can be accessed with a just few keystrokes.
Even when Internet service isn’t available, customer service is typically available 24/7 via telephone.
Better Rates. Infrastructure and overhead costs are minimal and allow Internet banks to pay higher interest rates on savings accounts while charging lower loan and mortgage rates. There are even accounts with no minimum balance or service fees that can be opened without a minimum initial deposit.
Extensive services. Internet banks normally have better quality websites than traditional banks, with more comprehensive content. Such features can include functional budgeting and forecasting tools, online financial planners, investment analysis tools, trading platforms and loan calculators.
Banking on-the-go. Internet banking now almost always includes mobile capabilities. New applications are continuously being created to further expand and improve this capability on smart phones and other mobile devices.
Transfers. While traditional banks do allow funds to be moved via electronic transfer, often there is a fee. Most internet banks offer unlimited transfers at zero cost. This even includes transfers to outside financial institutions. They also accept authorized direct deposits and withdrawals, such as payroll deposits and automatic bill payment.
Ease of Use. Online accounts are quite easy to set up and don’t require any more information than a traditional bank account. If you don’t want to complete the application online, the forms can be downloaded and mailed. Online checks are actually easier to use, since the payee information is automatically saved for future use.
Disadvantages of Internet Banking
Personal connections. A regular bank does offer a better opportunity to develop a personal relationship. These connections can help when you need a loan or other special service. Your local bank manager also has some discretion when you’d like an overdraft fee removed.
Transaction issues. Complicated transactions and large cash transactions can be challenging with an online bank. Most Internet banks don’t have their own ATMs, though some have begun to form network alliances with traditional banks. But in most cases, ATM use is going to cost you.
Available services. Some Internet banks may not have the full range of financial services that a traditional bank has, such as insurance offerings and notarization.
Security. Internet banks are required to obey the same laws and regulations as a traditional bank, and the FDIC insures the bank accounts. However, having electronic access to your accounts always carries some additional risk to your data, regardless of whether you’re using a traditional bank or an Internet bank.
As with anything else, there are advantages and disadvantages to both online and traditional banking. Your ultimate solution might be to utilize both types of banks. Use the points above to consider your own situation to help you make an informed decision.
You can accomplish anything if you’re willing to fail along the way. Failure is a consistent part of success. The most successful people fail far more often than the least successful people.
Life is full of setbacks. The question is whether you allow failure and other setbacks to derail your efforts. Everyone can learn to better deal with these common annoyances on the road to success.
Failure is a funny thing. It feels embarrassing and catastrophic, but that’s rarely the case. You fail every day. When you think your keys are in the kitchen drawer, but discover they are not, you failed. However, you don’t let it bother you. Instead, you just look somewhere else.
Dealing with failure can be that simple. If your first attempt doesn’t work, try something else.
The same can be said for your 30th failed attempt. Most people try a time or two and then give up. They decide it either can’t be done, or the stress of failing becomes too much to bear.
Use this process to overcome failure:
Maintain your composure. Nothing will derail your progress like becoming emotionally distraught or quitting altogether. Undesirable results happen more often than not. It’s important to understand this fact.
When you expect that you’ll sometimes fail, it won’t bother you nearly as much. You simply keep going.
Determine what went wrong. If possible, determine the error in your approach. Do your best to understand exactly what happened and why. If you don’t understand the issue, you can’t correct it.
Maybe you just need to try again. Some things just naturally have high failure rates, like sales. For some products and services, you might face 100s of failures between successes. There’s no reason to fret, just try again. And again. And again.
Alter your approach. It’s important to keep improving your method. No matter how great you are at something, it can always be better. Take a few minutes each day and adjust your approach.
Look for alternatives. Maybe you need to try a completely new approach. There are often multiple ways around any obstacle. Maybe you can find a better alternative. For example, if you’ve been cold-calling for clients, maybe it would be better to:
Ask people you know for referrals
Show up in person
Attend meetups or conventions
Pass out flyers
Send lumpy mail
If you’ve thoroughly investigated one method, try another.
Sharpen your axe. Sometimes it’s not about how hard you chop at the trees. It’s about how sharp your axe is. Develop yourself each day. Work on your general sales skills and charisma if those are useful. A chemist might brush up on his knowledge of synthetic organic chemistry.
Work on your coping skills. Figure out the best ways to handle the stress and other negative emotions that commonly accompany failure and setbacks.
Keep your options healthy. Calling a friend, exercise, and meditation are examples of acceptable options.
Using drugs, alcohol, or food are examples of unhealthy coping strategies.
You can’t succeed if you can’t handle failure. Most of us are far more afraid of failure than we should be. A failed sales call or 30-foot putt isn’t a life and death matter. The most successful people fail more often than they succeed. It’s just part of the game.
One of the best ways to predict your success is to look at your ability to handle failure. Successful people handle failure without any undo fuss. Just learn and keep going.
There are many programs that provide various types of support to mothers and children. These programs are primarily need based and can be very important to the health, safety and well being of your family.
Let’s take a look at a few of the more widespread and popular programs. The programs below are federal programs, but services are provided at the state level. Many states have assistance programs, too, so remember to check with your state for what they have available.
Women, Infants and Children (WIC). This agency provides grants to states for food, nutrition education and health care referrals to pregnant or postpartum mothers, infants, and children up to age five. The program provides essential foods like juice, milk, cereal, bread, cheese, and more.
The programs are administered at the state level, so you’ll have to track down the WIC program in your state.
There is a registration and qualification process.
Food Stamp Program. The food stamp program is also referred to as the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program (SNAP). It exists to help lower-income people purchase food. Although it’s a federal government program, it is run by state or local agencies. Anyone can apply to the program and there are numerous requirements.
You’ll need a social security number and if you are physically able to work, you must participate in a training program. Food stamp applications are available at any social security office.
The amount of assistance you can receive varies based on income, amount of your utility bills, assets, and more. There is an online tool available at http://www.snap-step1.usda.gov/fns/.
Medicaid. Medicaid is a program that provides medical care access for low-income families and other groups. Medicaid covers pregnant women and children under the age of 6, providing that certain income levels are not exceeded.
Housing assistance. Low-income families can get reduced housing costs. Public housing developments are available, as well as an option to receive subsidies for non-public housing. Eligibility is income-based.
Your local YWCA may also have housing available to women and children. Be sure to check it out.
Child Welfare Information Gateway. This is an information resource developed to connect lower income mothers and families to resources and tools related to child welfare, child abuse, neglect, child care, adoption, and more.
Temporary Assistance to Needy Families (TANF). In the past, this service has been referred to as ‘welfare’. The program provides cash payments to families in need.The income requirements are very low, but the program is available to those that need it. More information can be found at http://www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/ofa/.
Many programs exist to help lower income families. It’s not always easy to track down the assistance that you need. The phone book and Internet can be extremely helpful in your search efforts. Keep in mind that most federal programs are administered at the state level, but many states have their own programs as well.
Help is out there for you and your baby if you have a genuine need. Be sure you’re taking advantage of all the services that are available to you. Good luck!
Life isn’t as complicated or as scary as you might think. With just a few, simple truths, you can make your life a lot easier, more productive, and more enjoyable.
Most of us are worried about things that don’t matter. If we could see the reality of the situation, we’d worry a lot less.
We’re also making life more challenging than it needs to be.
Change your perspective with these simple truths, and your life will change, too:
The Universe doesn’t care. Sometimes it seems like the sun, the moon, and the stars are plotting against you, but it’s simply not true. The universe doesn’t play favorites. It doesn’t care. It’s up to you to create the life you desire.
Ninety-nine percent of the people in your life don’t really care, either. Most people aren’t that concerned with your happiness and success. They’re too busy worrying about themselves to worry about you. So, their opinions don’t really matter.
In the long run, your mistakes won’t matter. If you’re worried about messing up, making an incorrect decision, or a mistake you’ve made, ask yourself if it will make a difference in a hundred years. If not, you can avoid worrying about it.
It’s important to be choosy with regards to friends and romantic partners. Your life is incredibly important to you. Consequently, it’s important to be incredibly selective about who you allow into your life. The people in your life can make it significantly better or worse.
Things beyond your control don’t deserve your attention. If you can’t affect it, what’s the point in worrying about it? Put your attention on something you can influence.
Happiness and success don’t have to happen at the same time. There are successful people that are miserable. There are happy people that are struggling. Becoming successful won’t necessarily make you happy. If you seem to be failing left and right, it doesn’t mean you can’t be happy.
Making a mediocre choice is better than making no choice. Even if you don’t make the best choice, at least you’re moving forward. When you fail to make a decision, the decision will ultimately be made for you, and it won’t be in your best interest.
It’s often surprising what people will do if you’ll just ask. Most people are more accommodating than you might think. Instead of trying to take on the world alone, considering asking for some help now and then. You never know if you don’t ask. If your request is refused, you’re not any worse off.
Make your health a priority. We’d all be better off if we had made eating nutritiously and exercising a habit in our teenage years. It’s not too late to start. The sooner, the better. Decide to make your health a priority today. If you wait for a health crisis to take your health seriously, you’ve fallen way behind.
How you spend your time matters. The quality of your life is determined by how you spend your time each day. Spending time on frivolous activities doesn’t add value to your life. Think about how you spend your time. If you’ll use it more productively, your life will be more fulfilling.
Understanding the basics of life makes the whole game easier. Life becomes complicated when we ignore these basic ideas. For example, if you believe the universe is fundamentally against you, and you let just anyone into your inner circle, where is your life likely to end up?
Accept responsibility for your life, realize what matters to you, and spend your time wisely. Allow these truths to set you free.
Household chores and expenses aren’t a lot of fun. However, they add up to a lot of time and money over the years. With a little work, it’s possible to save a lot of time and money in your household. We never seem to have as much time and money as we’d like. Every little bit helps!
Save time and money in your household with these strategies:
Buy items in the off-season. Buy next season’s bathing suit at the end of summer. Buy a gas grill in the fall. Buy a motorcycle in the winter. Wait for the big sales and take full advantage of them. There is a season for many items, as well as a sale at the end.
Use a timer. A simple digital timer is one of the most important devices you can own if you want to save time. If you think it should take you 15 minutes to vacuum a large room, give yourself 10 minutes and notice how well you focus on the task. Everything gets done quicker when you use a timer.
Clean your barbecue grill in the oven. Instead of scrubbing your outdoor grill with a wire brush and harsh chemicals, take the cooking surface and put it in your oven at 500 degrees. Everything will cook off in short order. Nothing could be simpler, and you’ll save a lot of time.
Buy a Sunday paper. The news doesn’t change that much that you need to get the paper every day. So much news is available online for free that newspapers are nearly obsolete. However, the Sunday paper is loaded with coupons and sales notices. The Sunday paper can pay for itself many times over.
Visit the dollar store. For simple items like paper towels, soap, tape, pencils, and cleaning supplies, the local dollar store is hard to beat. Plan a trip and take note of the available items and how much you’ll save.
Grow your own herbs. Herbs are expensive, and dried herbs never seem to taste as good as fresh. Herbs are also one of those things you only notice you need when a recipe calls for them. This often results in a trip to the store for just that single item. Most herbs are easy and inexpensive to grow.
Use energy efficient light bulbs. This type of bulb is becoming less expensive all the time. They still aren’t cheap, but the cost is small compared to the longevity. They use much less electricity than incandescent bulbs. You’ll save a lot of time and money over time.
Buy your own coffee supplies. Starbucks and similar stores are expensive for what you get. A little espresso and 2 cups of hot milk aren’t worth $5+. For a small investment, you can buy your own equipment and make your own fancy coffee for a fraction of the cost.
Your household is costing you more time and money than it should. With a few tweaks, you could save more of both and spend them somewhere more enjoyable. Spend some time looking at your expenses, with regards to both money and time. Look for ways to cut back on both. We could all use more time and money.
No matter where you are on your life journey, setbacks can cause disappointment and a loss of momentum.
Whether it’s a new career you’re working towards or an overall appreciation of life, every step towards fulfillment can seem financially, emotionally, or psychologically draining from time to time.
To boost your confidence, here’s a list of the top 10 power words and tips to keep you motivated and passionate, no matter what life throws your way:
Purpose. Whenever you’re feeling discouraged or disappointed, always remember your original purpose. Reminding yourself of the original reason for venturing down your path in the first place will help refresh your mind when things go awry.
Planning. Though you may think that you’ve done enough planning towards the fulfillment of your goal, thinking it through again will help eliminate aspects of your plan of action that may be causing you setbacks. Put all your thoughts down on paper, from the smallest details to the larger movements.
Being able to see the timeline of your mission will help you focus on taking one step at a time to reach your goals.
Acceptance. Accepting that you’re a human being who’s bound to have ups and downs is absolutely crucial to your success. Without this self-acceptance, you’ll be subject to a foggy mind that’s unable to think positively, clearly, and innovatively.
Acceptance of what hasn’t worked in the past helps you gain a better knowledge of what will work in the future.
Reward. When your motivation starts to wean, it’s crucial to give yourself rewards along the way. This is one of the best ways to stay motivated on your path to success.
By giving yourself a taste of what you’re working for whether it’s financial freedom, career responsibility, or your dream lifestyle you won’t feel like you’re working so hard for nothing. This refreshes your mind and helps you work more productively.
Health. You know what this entails: moderate exercise, a healthy diet, and 7-8 hours of sleep per night. Feeling worn-down will make it almost impossible to pursue your goals and vision with the same clarity and vigor you had when you first set out.
Take care of your basic needs first, and you’ll be strong enough to pursue your dreams.
Motivation. Research motivational books, CDs, and seminars. Sometimes hearing motivational tips from a different perspective can greatly motivate you to act and succeed.
Find a source or two that touches you in some way and keep them close for those moments when you feel discouraged. After all, we all get discouraged at one time or another.
Organization. Ever feel depressed and worn out, and then you clean your surroundings and instantly feel more focused and motivated? The same applies to your goal. Organize and clean house when it comes to the operation of your goal.
Organizing yourself gives you a fresh start and a feeling of clarity. In doing so, you’ll be able to attack your short and long-term goals more vigorously and effectively.
Refresh. Refresh your plan with something new. It could be a different tactic, setting, or career. Whatever it is, break out of the pattern you’re in and try something new. Even if this new tactic doesn’t yield positive results immediately, at the very least it will make you aware of the availability of your options.
Networking. Reach out to people in your industry or those who share your life goal. You can do this a number of ways: check out local clubs, find a plethora people online, or talk to existing contacts that may have already succeeded in your goal.
Having someone to voice your struggles, questions, and experience to will invigorate you to keep moving forward.
Action. Taking action, despite doubts and setbacks, will further your progress. By moving on, despite any pessimistic thoughts, you will motivate yourself by the sheer momentum of doing something proactive to change your circumstances.
Whenever you feel like your progress has stalled, or you simply want some quick inspiration, look to these 10 powerful words and strategies to spur you on. You’re sure to find something to get you back on track toward success!
Managing time wisely and effectively is challenging. But excellent time management skills are invaluable, especially when trying to manage both a full-time job and a part-time business. There are other things in life besides just work.
If you want the opportunity to experience and enjoy other activities in life, getting your time under control is imperative.
It’s all about prioritizing, focusing, and being productive, rather than simply being busy.
These time management tips will help to guarantee that your time is spent wisely:
Focus on being productive. You can spend a lot of time actively working, yet accomplish relatively little. Being busy is about motion. Being productive is about results.
Consider the results you are likely to see from the course of action you’re about to undertake. Are the expected results worth the time?
Being busy all day and accomplishing nothing should be avoided by everyone, but it’s especially important for those with two jobs.
Drop the multi-tasking. The ability to multi-task has been lauded for decades, but recent research is showing that multi-tasking is a mistake. Some research has shown that focusing on one task at a time increases productivity and performance by 100%.
This can be the difference maker between success and failure if you’re juggling a part-time business with a full-time job. Productivity is everything. Focus on one thing until it’s time to move on to something else.
Consider using a timer to help you focus. If a task should take 25 minutes to complete, use a timer and try to beat the clock. A simple timer can really help you stay focused.
Have a new list of objectives and to-do list each day. Priorities and needs change from day to day. Start each day with a new list or priorities. Any items that are incomplete can be moved to tomorrow’s list, but only if they’re still priorities.
If you find it helpful, have a list of things to do before lunch and after lunch. Breaking up the day like this can make things more manageable.
Create the list the night before. You won’t waste time in the morning trying to plan your day. You might also find some elegant solutions to your challenges if you have the opportunity to sleep on them.
Make a real effort to eliminate distractions and interruptions. There’s always something else that needs your attention. However, you’ll get more done if you can stick to the important tasks before allowing other things to grab your attention.
You might want to spend the first two hours of each morning working on the most important tasks of the day before opening your email or listening to your phone messages.
Make decisions with the time expenditure in mind. Working full-time and running a part-time business requires focusing on the time required by certain activities. Quick decision-making skills are vital.
Many times, the second or third best solution is really the best solution if it saves time.
Sometimes a good, quick solution is better than the best solution that is complicated and too time-consuming to implement.
Delegate whenever possible. Whether it’s at the job or the business, delegate as much as you can. Do you insist on doing too much? Attempt to release some control and get all the help you can.
Managing a full-time job and a part-time business is challenging, but many people are able to manage both successfully. Focus on the most important tasks, minimize the distractions around you, and let others help. You’ll get more done in less time with greater results!
Ensure you’re not blindly following any of the advice below. If you are, evaluate how it is working for you before you continue.
Not all self-help advice is great advice. Just as doctors and lawyers are wrong from time to time, your favorite self-help guru may have spread some poor advice, too. Some of the most common self-help tips have been shown to be ineffective or even detrimental.
Are you trying to follow these self-help tips?
Announce your goals to the world. They say that if you tell everyone you know about your goals, you’ll be less likely to give up. The idea being that you’ll be too embarrassed to quit. It sounds reasonable, but studies have shown that this advice doesn’t work for most people.
It’s believed that this advice fails to work for one major reason: Most of the people you tell will try to sabotage you in some way.
Imagine your goal was to climb Mt Rainier in six months. You might hear things like:
People die climbing mountains.
Didn’t you once trip climbing the stairs?
How will you get enough money to fly to Washington?
You’ll have to lose a lot of weight to make it up a mountain.
We don’t have any mountains in Florida. There’s no good way to train here. You’ll never be properly prepared.
It sounds expensive. How will you pay for it?
And so on. Most people don’t want to see you do too well, and they’ll find ways to hold you back as a result.
Keep your goals to yourself. The odds of succeeding are usually greater.
Pattern yourself after the most successful people. The most successful people in any field are anomalies. Being the best anything in the world is like trying to be the fastest human in the world. There are only a few people with the genetic makeup to succeed at the highest level.
For example, striving to be like LeBron James isn’t the best way to get into the NBA for the average person. People with enough talent can make a lot of mistakes and still be successful.
Keep in mind that for many fields, success at the highest level involves a lot of luck.
Find the strategies that have worked for many people and incorporate those into your life.
Just visualize your goal and think positive thoughts. This is poor advice when it’s the only advice. A few years ago, it was popular to believe that positive thoughts alone could manifest anything you could imagine. This led some to believe that there was no reason to leave their couch.
It’s attractive to believe that no effort is required to create anything you desire, but life doesn’t work that way. You’re not going to wake up to a Mercedes in your garage simply by daydreaming about it and reciting affirmations to yourself.
Positive thinking, knowing your goals, and visualizing success are helpful, but insufficient. Nothing changes until you do something or convince someone else to do something.
Do what you love and the money will follow. There’s only one problem with this idea. The things that you like are either the same things that everyone else likes, so there’s a lot of competition. Or, the things you like aren’t easy to monetize, like playing horseshoes or watching TV in your robe.
To make more money, it’s important to find something to do that’s valuable to enough people in the world that you can generate enough income to enjoy the lifestyle you desire. It also has to be something you’re capable of doing. Hopefully, you can enjoy it, too.
Have you been using any of these ideas? They’re not bad advice for everyone, but they’ve been shown to be a poor choice for over 50% of the population. If something isn’t working for you, it might be time to give something else a try. Life is challenging enough without making it even harder!